Call me old fashioned but I think manners are very important; please and thank you. The latter being especially important when it comes to your wedding etiquette. It is practically a requirement that gratitude play a large role in your nuptial festivities and not just in the form of thank you cards for gifts received. Here’s where you should show thanks and why.
SHOWING THANKS FOR GIFTS RECEIVED BEFORE THE WEDDING (OR MONTHS AFTERWARDS)
The no-brainer. Anytime someone gives you a wedding gift, be it a card (with or without monetary additives), a physical item, or a gift card, you absolutely must send a thank you card promptly. My suggestions is within 3 days of receiving the gift. Including a personalized and handwritten message will make you an A+ student and the karmic gods will part the clouds to shine down on your stellar behavior.
SHOWING THANKS FOR COMING TO THE WEDDING (OR OTHER PARTIES)…
Not required, but a wedding favor is a fun way of saying, ‘Gee, thanks for coming, here’s a little token of my appreciation.’ You can create a cute display or combine favors with your guest seating assignment (place cards or escort cards). Take the opportunity to create something unique, allowing your personality to come through or your wedding design to shine.
…WITH FACE TIME
At some point you as a couple should stand up, in front of your guests and thank them for coming. You should also plan to either have a receiving line or greet guests table by table during the reception. This is important. Your guests are strangely selfish when it comes to this concept and they feel as though they are at least entitled to some face time with your and your new spouse to congratulate you.
If you hate the idea of a receiving line and do not want to greet guests at their dinner tables, I understand, it’s your day and you have every right to dictate what you do during it. What if your guest list was smaller? Would it make either of these ideas more appealing?
Still a no?
Please be prepared for a small handful of disgruntled guests to vocalize to all with ears how dissatisfied they are that they ‘haven’t even been able to talk to the bride or the groom yet!!’.
How rude, but totally a thing that could happen should you opt to ignore this etiquette responsibility.
SHOWING THANKS FOR GIFTS BROUGHT TO THE WEDDING
Post-wedding you’ll likely notice that you are going to be writing thank yous to guests who brought a gift or a card to the wedding. How proper of them to bring a gift. But what about people who shipped your gift to your house and have already been thanked, but attended the wedding?
It would, once again, be star student behavior if you thanked all guests for attending your wedding, mentioning the gift they gave (regardless of when it was received and if a thank you has already been written) and including a wedding day picture.
Call me crazy, but people really, really enjoy this extra step. It’s worth the investment. Click here to read more and view samples of what to say from Minted.
SHOWING THANKS TO YOUR WEDDING PARTY + PARENTS
Thank these people! Write them a letter, send them a card, buy them a gift, give them a hug. Intentionally, these are the most important people in your life, supporting you on the most important day of your life. Because there are fewer people to think about I encourage you to be detail oriented and put stingy on the shelf. Listen to episode 038 of Under the Veil for more tips.
SHOWING THANKS TO VENDORS
Tips, referrals and reviews. Most of the wedding vendors you work with will be small (tiny) business owners. Choosing one, or all three of these options will truly be a great way to show your gratitude. Want to read more about tipping vendors? Click here.
So, what kind of thank you’s will you give for your wedding? Of course all of these tasks will need to be entered into your timeline and checklist, and I can help with that. If you are looking for a day of coordinator, look no further, click the button below to start your stress-free wedding planning journey.
Prosperity, Love & Happiness,
Photos by Kelly Reeves Photography