The One Where We Digress


This episode was such a great reminder, for me, that your wedding day is a day to be enjoyed. Even though I have a hard on for timelines, the purpose of the timeline is not to dictate your every move, but to allow the opportunity for you (plural) to enjoy your day. For all the things that you've envisioned, that you've paid for and picked out, to have the space for those things to happen and be enjoyed.

Bear with me, standing on my soap box for a moment longer.

This is your friggen wedding day and regardless of what it is you want the day to look like and to feel like, you deserve to be in your day. This isn't a movie set or a photo shoot. The point isn't to go from one mark to another, look at the camera and pose, and then find you're next mark.

Kimberly reminded me of that, you should just go through you day, let me do the worrying, let me concern myself of all the things that have to happen on your day and when and how. You just do them. Just be. Just enjoy and Kimberly will capture it all.

Also, I second what she said about hiring professionals who can get you there with ease.


  • Things will just happen without you having to make them happen

  • Example: Your reception room set up

  • All of the people will be in better moods, because they will be treated better, because happy people do nice things subconsciously

  • Example: Being greeted in the morning with smiles and hugs instead of frowns and hurry-ups and worrying looks

  • You can ask for referrals for vendors that you haven't booked yet and your wedding team will become even stronger

  • Example: When your photographer and videographer get along so well that your photos and video shine bright like a diamond.

  • You'll feel like you are getting more BANG for your BUCK

  • Example: Need I?

Expansion: There are different levels at which we function as it relates to the competence hierarchy (remember AP Psychology and our friend Abraham Maslow?). Initially we are unconsciously incompetent, you've heard me say many a time, 'you don't know what you don't know'.

Then, we might have this recognition that what we are doing isn't quite right, and we might want to get better, thus we are now consciously incompetent.

So, we work hard to do better and to be right or good or correct, we are consciously competent, we must concentrate to achieve this level of skill execution.

Lastly, with enough practice, those skills become unconsciously competent. If you're still with me, this is the best kind.

This is what you want at your wedding, a bunch of vendors who excel at what they are hired to do, but they do so without even giving it a second thought. Their skill is so second nature, it's like scratching an itch or repositioning in your seat, you just do it and you didn't even know you were doing it.


There are different types of photographers. This is a given. What might immediately come to mind? Dark and moody. Bright and airy. Heavily retouched. Completely unedited.

What Kimberly brought to mind was a difference in shooting style. Candids versus posed.

Of course, today, a little thing called Pinterest makes wedding photos a bit more posed, because you want to get. those. shots. The veil draped around you and your fiancé, a close up forehead touch, the groom crying when he sees the person he's about to be married to for the first time in hours.

Kimberly's style is much more spontaneous, less regimented and kind of a breath of fresh air to the stressors of having a picture perfect day.

Hiring a professional who is curious and who wants to stretch their creative freedom can be to your absolute benefit: see Studio KH on Instagram.